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| was it even abuse book: If He's So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad? Avery Neal, 2018-03-27 Free yourself from toxic relationships with “the new gold standard in abuse recovery” from the founder of the Women’s Therapy Clinic (Jackson MacKenzie, author of Whole Again). Foreword by Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D., New York Times bestselling author of Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office ARE YOU A VICTIM OF SUBTLE ABUSE? Are you always the one apologizing? Constantly questioning and blaming yourself? Do you often feel confused, frustrated, and angry? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you’re not alone. Nearly half of all women—and men—in the United States experience psychological abuse without realizing it. Manipulation, deception, and disrespect leave no physical scars, but they can be just as traumatic as physical abuse. In this groundbreaking book, Avery Neal, founder of the Women’s Therapy Clinic, helps you recognize the warning signs of subtle abuse. As you learn to identify patterns that have never made sense before, you are better equipped to make changes. From letting go of fear to setting boundaries, whether you’re gathering the courage to finally leave or learning how to guard against a chronically abusive pattern, If He’s So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad? will help you enjoy a happy, healthy, fulfilling life, free of shame or blame. “This book can open eyes for people who may have lost pieces of themselves along the way. Great examples and exercises. It is a companion from start to finish.” —Dr. Jay Carter, author of Nasty People “No-nonsense insights and practical ways to regain control of and empower your life.” —Dr. George Simon, international bestselling author of In Sheep’s Clothing |
| was it even abuse book: Outgrowing the Pain Eliana Gil, 2009-07-22 “Anyone who had a troubled childhood ought to read this book.”—Anne H. Cohn, D.P.H., Executive Director, National Committee for Prevention of Child Abuse Do you have trouble finding friends, lovers, acquaintances? Once you find them, do they dump on you, take advantage of you, or leave? Are you in a relationship you know isn't good for you? Are you still trying to figure out what you want to do when you grow up? Are you drinking too much, eating too much or trying to numb your pain with drugs of any kind? These are just a few of the problems abused children experience when they become adults. You may not realize you were abused. You may think your parents didn't mean it, didn't know better, or that others had it much worse. You may not even have made the connection between the past and your current problems. Outgrowing the Pain is an important book for any adult who was abused or neglected in childhood. It's an important book for professionals who help others. It's a book of questions that can pinpoint and illuminate destructive patterns. The answers you discover can lead to a life filled with new insight, hope, and love. “The best book available to help survivors cope and understand.”—Dan Sexton, Director, Childhelp's National Abuse Hotline “An invaluable aid for adult survivors of child abuse.”—Suzanne M. Sgroi, M.D., Executive Director, New England Clinical Associates |
| was it even abuse book: Why Does He Do That? Lundy Bancroft, 2003-09-02 In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft—a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men—uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued, and to find ways to get free of an abusive relationship. He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You’ve asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men—and change your life. In Why Does He Do That? you will learn about: • The early warning signs of abuse • The nature of abusive thinking • Myths about abusers • Ten abusive personality types • The role of drugs and alcohol • What you can fix, and what you can’t • And how to get out of an abusive relationship safely “This is without a doubt the most informative and useful book yet written on the subject of abusive men. Women who are armed with the insights found in these pages will be on the road to recovering control of their lives.”—Jay G. Silverman, Ph.D., Director, Violence Prevention Programs, Harvard School of Public Health |
| was it even abuse book: When a Woman You Love Was Abused Dawn Scott Jones, 2012-08 The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services reports that 80 percent of childhood abuse victims later suffer from at least one abuse-induced psychological disorder. Its proven that the effects of childhood abuse follow women into adulthood. Yet few men are prepared to deal with those effects, even when their own wife is the one who is suffering. And their wifes suffering becomes their own suffering as their needs arent being met by a wife who is powerless to control her inner turmoil. Author, pastor, and survivor Dawn Scott Jones candidly shares her own abuse experience to help husbands understand the varied emotions, fears, distorted thoughts, and triggers that hold their wives captive. In practical and accessible language, Jones explains the stages of the healing journey (processing denial, asking for help, grieving, expressing anger, learning to forgive, and finding resolution). Building on that knowledge, Jones then moves to an honest discussion of what husbands can do to help. Whether its creating a healing environment, understanding the need for control, building trust, or even just praying for healing, a husband plays an active role in helping his wife survive and thrive despite her past abuse. Offering hope for a healthy marriage relationship, When a Woman You Love Was Abused answers the questions men have and offers the advice they need to help their wives finally find peace. |
| was it even abuse book: Escaping Emotional Abuse Beverly Engel, 2020-12-29 Does your partner blame you for his or her own problems? Does your partner humiliate you, especially in front of others? Is your partner impossible to please? Are you convinced something is wrong with you? Are you too ashamed to admit you are being abused? In Escaping Emotional Abuse, Beverly Engel, world-renowned therapist and expert in emotional abuse, exposes techniques an abuser uses to break your spirit and gain control - and guides you in how to free yourself from the shame that can keep you from the life, and the love, that you deserve. By using your deepest fears against you, the abuser strips you of self-esteem, dignity, and humanity - making you feel unworthy and utterly powerless to escape. But you possess a potent tool with which to combat shame: self-compassion. In these pages, Engel shows you how to access it. Using her highly effective Shame Reduction Program, she helps you jumpstart the process of recovery by offering specific steps to help you heal and regain self-confidence. An invaluable resource for both men and women who suffer from emotional abuse, as well as therapists and advocates, Escaping Emotional Abuse is a supportive, nurturing guide for anyone seeking to break the chains of shame, and gain the emotional freedom to create healthier, lasting relationships. |
| was it even abuse book: Coercive Control Evan Stark, 2009-03-01 One of the most important books ever written on domestic violence, Coercive Control breaks through entrenched views of physical abuse that have ultimately failed to protect women. Evan Stark, founder of one of America's first battered women's shelters, shows how domestic violence is neither primarily domestic nor necessarily violent, but a pattern of controlling behaviors more akin to terrorism and hostage-taking. Drawing on court records, interviews, and FBI statistics, Stark details coercive strategies that men use to deny women their very personhood, from beeper games to food logs to micromanaging dress, speech, sexual activity, and work. Stark urges us to move beyond the injury model and focus on the real victimization that allows men to violate women's human rights with impunity. Provocative and brilliantly argued, Coercive Control reframes abuse as a liberty crime rather than a crime of assault and points the way to bringing real equality for women in line with their formal rights to personhood and citizenship, freedom and safety. |
| was it even abuse book: A Kids Book About Sexual Abuse Evelyn Yang, 2025-03-11 Knowledge is the best defense. Give your kids the tools to identify abuse and the language to defend their bodies. Some of the most difficult things to talk about are also the most important. Sexual abuse happens more often than people realize but most kids don't learn about it until after it happens. This book will help give them the language to understand what sexual abuse is and start the conversation around owning their bodies and trusting their instincts. |
| was it even abuse book: The Life-Saving Divorce Gretchen Baskerville, 2020-02 You Can Love God and Still Get a Divorce. And get this, God will still love you. Really. Are you in a destructive marriage? One of emotional, physical, or verbal abuse? Infidelity? Neglect? If yes, you know you need to escape, but you're probably worried about going against God's will. I have good news for you. You might need to divorce to save your life and sanity. And God is right beside you. In The Life-Saving Divorce You'll Learn: - How to know if you should stay or if you should go.- The four key Bible verses that support divorce for infidelity, neglect, and physical and/or emotional abuse. - Twenty-seven myths about divorce that aren't true for many Christians. - Why a divorce is likely the absolute best thing for your children. - How to deal with friends and family who disapprove of divorce. - How to find safe friends and churches after a divorce. Can you find happiness after leaving your destructive marriage? Absolutely yes! You can get your life back and flourish more than you thought possible. Are you ready? Then let's go. It's time to be free. This book includes multiple first-person interviews. Explains psychological abuse, gaslighting, the abuse cycle, Christian divorce and remarriage, children and divorce, domestic violence, parental alienation, mental abuse, and biblical reasons for divorce. Includes diagrams such as the Duluth Wheel of Power and Control (the Duluth Model) and the Abuse Cycle, as well as graphs based on Paul Amato's 2003 study analyzing Judith Wallerstein's book, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce. Includes quotes by Leslie Vernick, Lundy Bancroft, Shannon Thomas, David Instone-Brewer, Natalie Hoffman, LifeWay Research, Kathleen Reay, Gottman Institute, Glenda Riley, Martin Luther, John Calvin, Steven Stosny, Michal Gilad, Leonie Westenberg, Nancy Nason-Clark, Julie Owens, Marg Mowczko, Justin Holcomb, Barna Group, Justin Lehmiller, Alan Hawkins, Brian Willoughby, William Doherty, Brad Wright, Bradford Wilcox, Sheila Gregoire, E Mavis Hetherington, John Kelly, Betsey Stevenson, Justin Wolfers, Norm Wright, Virginia Rutter, Judith Herman, and Bessel van der Kolk. Recommended reading list includes: Henry Cloud, John Townsend Boundaries books, Richard Warshack books. |
| was it even abuse book: The Verbally Abusive Relationship Patricia Evans, 2010-01-18 |
| was it even abuse book: It Wasn't Your Fault Beverly Engel, 2015-01-02 Shame is one of the most destructive of human emotions. If you suffered childhood physical or sexual abuse, you may experience such intense feelings of shame that it almost seems to define you as a person. In order to begin healing, it’s important for you to know that it wasn’t your fault. In this gentle guide, therapist and childhood abuse expert Beverly Engel presents a mindfulness and compassion-based therapeutic approach to help you overcome the debilitating shame that keeps you tied to the past. By following the step-by-step exercises in this book, you’ll gain a greater understanding of the root cause of your shame. And by cultivating compassion toward yourself, you will begin to heal and move past your painful experiences. Recent studies show that trauma survivors, particularly those with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) resulting from abuse, can greatly benefit from incorporating elements of self-compassion into their treatment. Furthermore, the practice of self-compassion has been shown to decrease PTSD symptoms, including, self-criticism, thought suppression, and rumination. This book is based on the author’s powerful and effective Compassion Cure program. With this book, you will develop the skills needed to finally put a stop the crippling self-blame that keeps you from moving on and being happy. You’ll learn to focus on your strengths, your courage, and your extraordinary ability to survive. Most of all, you’ll learn to replace shame with its counter emotion—pride. |
| was it even abuse book: Breaking the Cycle of Abuse Beverly Engel, 2004-11-01 A beacon of hope for women and men who fear that they will pass the abuse they have suffered on to their children, partners, or employees. Humane and compassionate but also clear and down to earth, this is a wonderful contribution to the literature on healing. --Lundy Bancroft, author of When Dad Hurts Mom and Why Does He Do That? In this remarkably powerful, wise, and compassionate book, Beverly Engel leads readers step by step through a program that will help survivors of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse in childhood to heal from their wounds so they don't need to re-enact their abusive pasts. She offers expert advice and strategies to help parents and would-be parents avoid doing to their children what was done to them and helps both abusers and victims in emotionally and physically abusive relationships make vitally important changes in their relationships. --Susan Forward, Ph.D., author of Toxic Parents and Emotional Blackmail If you were emotionally, physically, or sexually abused as a child or adolescent, or if you experienced neglect or abandonment, it isn't a question of whether you will continue the cycle of abuse but rather a question of how--whether you will become an abuser or continue to be a victim. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, a leading expert on emotional and sexual abuse, explains how to stop the cycle of abuse once and for all. Her step-by-step program provides the necessary skills for gaining control over emotions, changing negative attitudes, learning healthy ways of communicating, healing the damage from prior abuse, and seeking out support. Throughout, Engel shares many dramatic personal stories including her own experiences with abusive behavior. Breaking the Cycle of Abuse gives you the power to shatter abusive patterns for good and offers a legacy of hope and healing for you and your family. |
| was it even abuse book: Victory Over Verbal Abuse Patricia Evans, 2011-12-18 Includes inspiring affirmations for every week of the year--Cover. |
| was it even abuse book: The Emotionally Abusive Relationship Beverly Engel, 2003-08-13 Engel doesn't just describe-she shows us the way out. -Susan Forward, author of Emotional Blackmail Praise for the emotionally abusive relationship In this book, Beverly Engel clearly and with caring offers step-by-step strategies to stop emotional abuse. . . helping both victims and abusers to identify the patterns of this painful and traumatic type of abuse. This book is a guide both for individuals and for couples stuck in the tragic patterns of emotional abuse. -Marti Loring, Ph.D., author of Emotional Abuse and coeditor of The Journal of Emotional Abuse This groundbreaking book succeeds in helping people stop emotional abuse by focusing on both the abuser and the abused and showing each party what emotional abuse is, how it affects the relationship, and how to stop it. Its unique focus on the dynamic relationship makes it more likely that each person will grasp the tools for change and really use them. -Randi Kreger, author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook and owner of BPDCentral.com The number of people who become involved with partners who abuse them emotionally and/or who are emotionally abusive themselves is phenomenal, and yet emotional abuse is the least understood form of abuse. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, one of the world's leading experts on the subject, shows us what it is and what to do about it. Whether you suspect you are being emotionally abused, fear that you might be emotionally abusing your partner, or think that both you and your partner are emotionally abusing each other, this book is for you. The Emotionally Abusive Relationship will tell you how to identify emotional abuse and how to find the roots of your behavior. Combining dramatic personal stories with action steps to heal, Engel provides prescriptive strategies that will allow you and your partner to work together to stop bringing out the worst in each other and stop the abuse. By teaching those who are being emotionally abused how to help themselves and those who are being emotionally abusive how to stop abusing, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship offers the expert guidance and support you need. |
| was it even abuse book: We Believe the Children Richard Beck, 2015-08-04 A brilliant, disturbing portrait of the dawn of the culture wars, when America started to tear itself apart with doubts, wild allegations, and an unfounded fear for the safety of children. During the 1980s in California, New Jersey, New York, Michigan, Massachusetts, Florida, Tennessee, Texas, Ohio, and elsewhere, day care workers were arrested, charged, tried, and convicted of committing horrible sexual crimes against the children they cared for. These crimes, social workers and prosecutors said, had gone undetected for years, and they consisted of a brutality and sadism that defied all imagining. The dangers of babysitting services and day care centers became a national news media fixation. Of the many hundreds of people who were investigated in connection with day care and ritual abuse cases around the country, some 190 were formally charged with crimes, leading to more than 80 convictions. It would take years for people to realize what the defendants had said all along -- that these prosecutions were the product of a decade-long outbreak of collective hysteria on par with the Salem witch trials. Social workers and detectives employed coercive interviewing techniques that led children to tell them what they wanted to hear. Local and national journalists fanned the flames by promoting the stories' salacious aspects, while aggressive prosecutors sought to make their careers by unearthing an unspeakable evil where parents feared it most. Using extensive archival research and drawing on dozens of interviews conducted with the hysteria's major figures, n+1 editor Richard Beck shows how a group of legislators, doctors, lawyers, and parents -- most working with the best of intentions -- set the stage for a cultural disaster. The climate of fear that surrounded these cases influenced a whole series of arguments about women, children, and sex. It also drove a right-wing cultural resurgence that, in many respects, continues to this day. |
| was it even abuse book: Something's Not Right Wade Mullen, 2020 Am I the only one who sees this-am I just imagining things? Is something wrong with me ... or could this be abuse? Maybe you don't know for sure: all you know is something feels off when you think about a certain relationship or interaction with an institution or organization. You feel alone and confused--but calling it abuse feels extreme and unsettling, a label for what happens to other people but not you. Yet you can't shake the feeling: something's not right. In his debut book, researcher and advocate Wade Mullen introduces us to the groundbreaking world of impression management--the strategies that individuals and organizations utilize to gain power and cover up their wrongdoings. Mullen reveals a pattern that accompanies many types of abuse, almost as if abusers are somehow reading from the same playbook. If we can learn to decode these evil methods--if we can learn the language of abuse--we can help stop the cycle and make abusers less effective at accomplishing destruction in our lives. Something's Not Right will help you to identify and describe tactics that were previously unidentifiable and indescribable, and give you the language you need to move toward freedom and create a safer future for yourself and others-- |
| was it even abuse book: The Truth Book Joy Castro, 2005 You must always, always tell the truth, no matter the consequences, for you must model yourself on Jehovah, and Jehovah does not lie. This is the most crucial rule of all, Joy Castro is told as a young girl in a Jehovahs Witness family. Joy is 12 years old when her divorced mother marries a brother in the church. He is highly respected in the community, having displayed the ultimate sign of spiritual devotion: he served at Bethel, the Watchtower headquarters in Brooklyn. At home, however, he is a despicable brute. For the two years her mother is married to him, Joy does not grow at all; in fact, she loses 16 pounds, an eloquent testimony to the physical, emotional, psychological, and sexual abuse she suffers at his hands. Her battered mother does nothing to protect her, nor does her church. She is sustained by a consuming fascination for horses and books and her protective love for her younger brother. Their daring escape from this unspeakable cruelty, to discover a nurturing home with their father, is the key to their survival and salvation. |
| was it even abuse book: Stalking the Soul Marie-France Hirigoyen, 2004 Emotional abuse exists all around us--in families and work. Stalking the Soul is a call to recognize and understand emotional abuse and, most importantly, overcome it. Sophisticated and accessible, it is vital reading for victims and health professionals. |
| was it even abuse book: Coercive Control: Breaking Free From Psychological Abuse Lauren Kozlowski, The devastation of a controlling relationship has to be endured to be believed. From the constant fear of upsetting your spouse, the walking on eggshells in case you've done or said something wrong, or the relentless feeling of anxiety, a controlling partner will beat you down until you no longer recognize yourself. Coercive control will see an abuser dominate their victim's life; from the food they eat, the people they see, the places they can go and the things they can say. A controlling partner, through fear and intimidation, will seek to ensure their victim is subdued, to the point of accepting any and all abuse that's fired their way. By manipulation, gaslighting, lies, and hurtful insults, the abuser will make their victim a willing puppet on a string, ready to be utilized how the controlling spouse sees fit. Coercive control is seldom talked about in comparison to other forms of abuse, yet it's so commonplace in relationships. Plenty of victims of this type of behavior may not even be aware that's it's full-blown abuse. Many more see controlling behavior as their partner's way of showing they 'care'. In order to shed light on this topic, and reach out to those who need help in understanding and overcoming a controlling partner, I have created this book as their starting point. I was shackled to a malignant narcissist for many years of my life, being controlled and manipulated, day-in, day-out. As a proud survivor of abuse, I feel obligated to help others in their journey towards getting their power back and recovering from the cruel effects of an abusive relationship. This book will cover the following: - what coercive control is - the devastating effects of a controlling relationship - financial coercion - breaking the spell of abuse - coercive control after separating I use my own experiences, as well as those of the survivors I've connected with via Escape the Narcissist, to help piece together the things you need to know about this type of abusive relationship. |
| was it even abuse book: Verbal and Emotional Abuse June Hunt, 2021-08-03 You didn’t think anyone could hurt you like this, but now that you’re in or have experienced an abusive relationship, what do you do? Abuse—whether through hurtful words, degrading looks, obscene gesture, or threatening behavior—inflicts immense pain and impedes emotional growth. We have all been wounded by hurtful words and actions of others—whether the bully at school, the demeaning boss, a rage-filled driver, or someone in our own family. We often carry those wounds with us for a lifetime. June Hunt has a message for you: it is possible to stop the pain of abuse. Learn biblical truths and practical advice on how to: Stop the abuse Heal the pain of the past Foster peace in all your relationships Learn all forms of abuse and what to pay attention to when a relationship gives off warning signs. Also included in the definitions section are biblical examples of verbal and emotional abuse. This mini-book will shed light on the characteristics of verbal and emotional abuse, words used in abusive conversations, methods of sabotage, and examples of what the victims may experience when dealing with an abusive relationship. Discover the causes of a person who abuses others and answer hard questions like, “How can he be so cruel?” and “How can she be so insensitive?” The last section, titled “Steps to Solution,” gives you practical advice on how to put an end to verbal and emotional abuse with: 7 steps to victory over verbal abuse 6 steps to an action plan 8 steps for how to confront and cope with emotionally abusive people Honesty test for those who may be abusive 5 steps to building personal boundaries Perfect for small groups and Bible studies, Sunday school, young adult and youth ministry, chaplaincy, Christian counseling, addiction and recovery programs, church giveaways, etc. |
| was it even abuse book: Triumph Over Abuse Christine E. Murray, 2020-12-29 In this book Christine Murray carefully weaves her personal experiences as a survivor with her professional expertise as a counselor, community advocate, and researcher into a comprehensive guidebook for survivors of abuse. Moving forward after suffering abuse at the hands of someone who is supposed to love and care for you is no easy feat. And yet, healing and recovering from past abuse is possible, and the journey to get there can be an empowering opportunity for growth. Triumph Over Abuse provides a road map for doing more than simply moving on from the past. Filled with accessible case studies and exercises, the book offers extensive practical guidance on a range of topics, such as building coping skills, surrounding yourself with the right kinds of support, working through traumatic memories, and channeling your experience into helping others and making a difference in the world. The book will inspire and equip survivors of abuse to build full, meaningful lives despite the trauma they have faced, as well as being a tool for clinicians to use to support clients. |
| was it even abuse book: Whole Again Jackson MacKenzie, 2019-01-08 From a leading voice on recovering from toxic relationships, a deeply insightful guide to getting back to your old self again--in order to truly heal and move on. Jackson MacKenzie has helped millions of people in their struggle to understand the experience of toxic relationships. His first book, Psychopath Free, explained how to identify and survive the immediate situation. In this highly anticipated new book, he guides readers on what to do next--how to fully heal from abuse in order to find love and acceptance for the self and others. Through his close work with--and deep connection to--thousands of survivors of abusive relationships Jackson discovered that most survivors have symptoms of trauma long after the relationship is over. These range from feelings of numbness and emptiness to depression, perfectionism, substance abuse, and many more. But he’s also found that it is possible to work through these symptoms and find love on the other side, and this book shows how. Through a practice of mindfulness, introspection, and exercises using specific tools, readers learn to identify the protective self they've developed - and uncover the core self, so that they can finally move on to live a full and authentic life--to once again feel light, free, and whole, and ready to love again. This book addresses and provides crucial guidance on topics and conditions like: complex PTSD, Narcissistic abuse, Avoidant Personality Disorder, Codependency, Core wounding, toxic shame, Borderline Personality Disorder, and so many more. Whole Again offers hope and multiple strategies to anyone who has survived a toxic relationship, as well as anyone suffering the effects of a breakup involving lying, cheating and other forms of abuse--to release old wounds and safely let the love back inside where it belongs. |
| was it even abuse book: Healing from Hidden Abuse Shannon Thomas, 2016-08-25 Healing from Hidden Abuse takes the reader through the six stages of recovery that are necessary for individuals to find important answers to the life chaos they have experienced. |
| was it even abuse book: In the Dream House Carmen Maria Machado, 2020-10 In the Dream House is Carmen Maria Machado's engrossing and wildly innovative account of a relationship gone bad. Tracing the full arc of a harrowing experience with a charismatic but volatile woman, this is a bold dissection of the mechanisms and cultural representations of psychological abuse. Each chapter views the relationship through a different narrative lens, as Machado holds events up to the light and examines them from distinct angles. She casts a critical eye over legal proceedings, fairy tales, Star Trek and Disney villains, as well as iconic works of film and fiction, infusing all with her characteristic wit, playfulness and openness to enquiry. The result is a powerful book that explodes our ideas about what a memoir can do and be. |
| was it even abuse book: The Mists of Avalon Marion Zimmer Bradley, 2000 Retells the legend of King Arthur as perceived by the women central to the tale, from the zealous Morgaine, sworn to uphold her goddess at any cost, to the devout Gwenhwyfar, pledged to the king but drawn to another. |
| was it even abuse book: I Am Me: Survivor of Child Abuse and Bullying Speaks Out Patrick Dati, 2014-01 I AM MESurvivor of Child Abuse and Bullying Speaks Out The true story about a person that chooses no longer to live as a victim but became a survivor.Do you view yourself as a victim and unaware how to overcome abuse? Do you need help conquering your demons and coming to terms with the nightmare of your past?Are you clueless on how to walk away from the individuals that hurt you and stand up for yourself?In this book you will: You will learn how to achieve strategies for survival and healing.Discover ways to help survivors identify and validate their childhood experience with child abuse and bullying.Identify and come to terms with your sexuality and not to hide who you really are to please others. Learn that suicide is not the way out and choosing to survive and take control of your life.Find the person you were meant to be and accept who you are and love yourself. |
| was it even abuse book: The Headship of Men and the Abuse of Women Kevin Giles, 2020-06-17 In recent years the issue of domestic abuse and violence has gained a lot of attention as the extent of it has become known. Domestic abuse and violence is now of high concern to most churches because it is evident that domestic abuse figures are much the same in our churches, and possibly higher in evangelical churches where the headship of men and the submission of women is made the God-given ideal. In this book, Kevin Giles surveys competently the scientific information on this matter now available and notes that the consensus is that the most sure indicator of higher incidences of abuse are found in communities where men are privileged and expected to be in charge and women are subordinated. This, he argues, should make complementarians consider afresh if in fact the subordination of women is the God-given ideal, established in creation before the fall. |
| was it even abuse book: Recovering from Religious Abuse Jack Watts, 2011-02-01 Jack Watts confronts one of Christianity’s deepest secrets and shares his own story of religious abuse, revealing the lifelong self-destructive behavior it produced—now in paperback. Jack Watts' startling personal story of being victimized by religious abuse and then sinking into alcoholism and self-destructive behaviors will resonate strongly with the many thousands of those who have been disenfranchised or even crushed by institutionalized religion. Recovering from Religious Abuse will help these walking wounded discover how to come to terms with their past as they heal from the inside out. Jack speaks to his readers as one who has been there, has felt their pain and bitterness, their desire to get even, their belief that they are worthless. But now he shares a new story of one who has finally found spiritual freedom and a deeply satisfying relationship with the God from whom he had once been alienated. Defining religious abuse as the use of spiritual authority to manipulate, harm, or use another person for personal gain, this practical step-by-step recovery manual takes readers on a journey that helps them fully realize the extent of the impact of their religious abuse, and progressively moves them toward healing and recovery. This 91-day plan includes daily readings, prayer, journaling instructions, and scriptures for reflection. |
| was it even abuse book: The Courage to Heal 4e Ellen Bass, Laura Davis, 2008-11-04 Come to terms with your past while moving powerfully into the future The Courage to Heal is an inspiring, comprehensive guide that offers hope and a map of the healing journey to every woman who was sexually abused as a child—and to those who care about her. Although the effects of child sexual abuse are long-term and severe, healing is possible. Weaving together personal experience with professional knowledge, the authors provide clear explanations, practical suggestions, and support throughout the healing process. Readers will feel recognized and encouraged by hundreds of moving first-person stories drawn from interviews and the authors' extensive work with survivors, both nationally and internationally. This completely revised and updated 20th anniversary edition continues to provide the compassionate wisdom the book has been famous for, as well as many new features: Contemporary research on trauma and the brain An overview of powerful new healing tools such as imagery, meditation, and body-centered practices Additional stories that reflect an even greater diversity of survivor experiences The reassuring accounts of survivors who have been healing for more than twenty years The most comprehensive, up-to-date resource guide in the field Insights from the authors' decades of experience Cherished by survivors, and recommended by therapists and institutions everywhere, The Courage to Heal has often been called the bible of healing from child sexual abuse. This new edition will continue to serve as the healing beacon it has always been. |
| was it even abuse book: Wounded by Words Susan Titus Osborn, Karen L. Kosman, Jeenie Gordon, 2008 In Wounded by Words, the authors explore how emotional abusers isolate, disorient, and indoctrinate their victims and how their unkind words leave lasting scars. |
| was it even abuse book: God Hates Abuse Robin Mullins Senger, 2016-01-14 God hates divorce! Christian wives frequently hear this first part of Malachi 2:16 as though the institution of marriage trumps the lives wrapped up in it. Rarely quoted is the second part of the verse, which says, along with the one who conceals his violence by outward appearances. Christian wives often think they must choose between two grim options: endure abuse or face condemnation by God for not obeying the Bible. As a result, guilt, despair, internal conflict and heartache cloak every moment as they cling to survival, trying to please both God and their husband. The future looks hopeless, and their identity and value obscured. Children grow up as secondary victims of domestic abuse, desensitized to God's ways and primed to continue the cycle of abuse as adults. Drawing from her own experience married to a dangerously abusive Christian man, Robin explores the common reluctance of Christian wives to leave their marriage. After fleeing her own marriage, Robin suffered from guilt and confusion as to whether God approved of her actions or not, and if she could divorce. After months of Bible study and reading the works of respected theologians and Christian leaders on the topic, she realized that in leaving her abusive marriage she had actually come into alignment with God's will. Robin understands the mentality and nature of abuse that drives these spiritually destructive marriages. She draws from a deep well of biblical insight and practical experience to give wives the tools necessary to be set free and live a life of hope, clarity and faith. God Hates Abuse is a biblically liberating and refreshing resource for Christian wives. It offers a lifeline out of the darkness of abuse and spiritual condemnation. Victims of spousal abuse will find this book validating, encouraging and healing, regardless if they are bound by their abuser or by errant teaching from the church. |
| was it even abuse book: Father of Lies Brian Evenson, 1998 Tells the disburbing tale of a clergyman and his unholy predilection for the children of his parish |
| was it even abuse book: My Only Sunshine Shannon Jump, 2021-02-25 My story is like that of many before me. I am a victim of domestic abuse and marital rape, a battered woman. I fell in love with a tall, dark and handsome man; a self-proclaimed bad boy with an unexpected and worsening drug problem. I was blind to his true colors when I said my vows and I feared there was no turning back. Set in a small town in Minnesota and spanning over twenty years, Brynn Reeves navigates through an abusive marriage, motherhood and friendship while coming to terms with the unexpected path her life has taken. Based loosely on true events, My Only Sunshine is a story of love, determination and strength, filled with raw emotion and kick-you-in-the-gut heartbreak. They said until death do them part; will Brynn find the strength to get out before it's too late? |
| was it even abuse book: No One To Save Me Melissa Jordan, 2020-07-31 It happened one night not long after that holiday. I think they had been out but I'm not sure. I remember I was sleeping in my bed when the noises of my mum and him getting home awoke me. Suddenly, my bedroom door opened but it wasn't my mum. I didn't know where she was. It was him. I pretended to be asleep. He came to the side of the bed and I didn't know what was happening but my mind told me to stay still. He pulled the covers back, I didn't move. I kept my eyes closed. My heart felt like it was jumping out of my chest. He lifted my legs apart and I let them move. He pulled up my nightdress and pulled my pants down. I didn't even try to open my eyes. Imagine being an innocent 7-year-old girl with a broke, single mum. Now imagine your mum meets a man that can give her a nice house and a better life in exchange for you. That's what happened to me. For years I suffered neglect and psychological and sexual abuse from him, with my mum being a silent witness. When I was finally able to get rid of him and escape, I didn't know that my life was only going to get worse. After a battle against addiction, depression and suicidal thoughts that lasted for years and with the help of therapy, I started to slowly recover and get my life back. Although my healing journey has just started and there's still a long way to go, I can say I'm alive. I had No One to Save Me, yet I survived. |
| was it even abuse book: Was it Even Abuse? Emma Rose Byham, 2022 Have you endlessly searched online trying to make sense of their behaviour? Hoping to understand how they treat you. 'Is it normal?' 'Why does it hurt so much?' Or perhaps you feel conflicted because you think their behaviour is unacceptable, but you question your judgement. You ask yourself, 'Is it me?' 'Am I too sensitive?' 'Am I crazy?' Was it Even Abuse was written by Emma Rose Byham, founder of The Personal Growth Project and Instagram community (@thepersonalgrowth.project) to support you in working through the chronic confusion and self-doubt experienced after emotional and psychological abuse. This book explores: The answers to key questions that create confusion. How minor incidents can be significantly abusive. Identifying abusive behaviour, trauma responses and the abusive dynamic. Reducing conflict between the potential and reality of the relationship. Reframing core beliefs about relationships and love. Emma helps you to restore clarity by breaking down a complex topic, supporting you to stop doubting what you've experienced, facilitate self-compassion for how you've been affected, reduce the inner conflict of who you understand them to be, and shift focus onto personal growth and building healthy relationships. |
| was it even abuse book: A Life Beyond Abuse Jerhonda Pace, 2018-09-07 Jerhonda tells her story of abuse and how she was able to move on from it |
| was it even abuse book: Emotional Abuse Zak Mucha, 2016-12-16 From the introduction by Joel Dvoskin, Ph.D.: But what happens when no one has the courage to intervene, to prevent the pain of another? While Zak Mucha's explanation of the harms of emotional abuse is useful, it pales in comparison to his wisdom in teaching us emotional self-defense. Learning to protect ourselves from emotional abuse changes everything. The victim no longer has to hope for the kindness of strangers, or that the abuser will simply get tired of their verbal assaults. Thanks to this wonderful book, each of us can learn to be our own hero, by learning some simple yet powerful ways to respond to emotional abuse. You are about to go on a journey that is at once deeply personal and scientifically valid. This book has been waiting a long time to be written. * Like any self-defense, we have to first identify what hurts. We have to recognize our own pain. We have been socialized to believe emotional abuse is not serious. We have been taught emotional abuse itself is nothing more than hurt feelings and there is no real evidence other than the victim's complaints. And if the only evidence is the victim's complaints, we wrongly justify, there is no way to verify whether a person was actually hurt. The victim of emotional abuse is dismissed precisely because he or she cannot prove their feelings. Emotional abuse creates a vicious dynamic where the victim is taught his or her feelings do not count and any pain suffered is, somehow, their own fault. Like any other abuse, emotional abuse is about power. Whoever can define reality has the ultimate power. In emotional abuse, the aggressor attempts to define reality with statements like, You're too sensitive, and I couldn't help it. You made me mad. Each statement is an attempt to shape how another person perceives reality. Our self-defense depends on our willingness to identify the boundaries that define who we are and the criteria we desire for relationship. In doing this, we can defend ourselves and define our selves. |
| was it even abuse book: The Book lover , 1903 |
| was it even abuse book: The Chap-book , 1897 |
| was it even abuse book: Institutes of masonic jurisprudence, an exemplification of the English book of constitutions methodically digested under appropriate heads; together with a summary view of the laws and principles of the royal arch George Oliver, 1874 |
| was it even abuse book: The Publishers Weekly , 1882 |
EVEN Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster
The meaning of EVEN is having a horizontal surface : flat. How to use even in a sentence. Synonym Discussion of Even.
EVEN | English meaning - Cambridge Dictionary
EVEN definition: 1. used to show that something is surprising, unusual, unexpected, or extreme: 2. at the same …
Even - Definition, Meaning & Synonyms - Vocabulary.com
6 days ago · Something smooth and regular, like a wall that's prepped for painting, is even. Even also describes a balance like when you give all the kids an even amount of …
Even - definition of even by The Free Dictionary
even - to a greater degree or extent; used with comparisons; "looked sick and felt even worse"; "an even (or still) more interesting problem"; "still another problem must be …
EVEN - Meaning & Translations | Collins English Dictionary
You use even to suggest that what comes just after or just before it in the sentence is rather surprising. 2. You use even with comparative adjectives and adverbs to emphasize a …
EVEN Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster
The meaning of EVEN is having a horizontal surface : flat. How to use even in a sentence. Synonym Discussion of Even.
EVEN | English meaning - Cambridge Dictionary
EVEN definition: 1. used to show that something is surprising, unusual, unexpected, or extreme: 2. at the …
Even - Definition, Meaning & Synonyms - Vocabulary.com
6 days ago · Something smooth and regular, like a wall that's prepped for painting, is even. Even also describes a balance like when you give all the …
Even - definition of even by The Free Dictionary
even - to a greater degree or extent; used with comparisons; "looked sick and felt even worse"; "an even (or still) more interesting problem"; "still …
EVEN - Meaning & Translations | Collins English Dictionary
You use even to suggest that what comes just after or just before it in the sentence is rather surprising. 2. You use even with comparative adjectives …
